the gift of food

My father and I share the gift of oven preparation alertness.

What I mean by this is that something woven deep in our intuitive mind-body clocks alerts us when the oven is ready. For some reason, it doesn’t work as well when the food is done, only the pre-heat. This fuels my distaste for burnt frozen pizzas. Weird.

My father punches in times like 3:37 to cook popcorn in the microwave. He’s like a microwave scientist.

Today I celebrated successfully opening the croissant roll container. Last time was a violent disaster that harmed the ascetic value of the rolls. Thankfully, I had two containers this time, so when I ripped the directions off container #1, I went back and read them on #2. They were delicious.

Now I know the secret of the rolls. Dad would be proud.

I called last year, “the year of Hamburger Helper without the hamburger,” and perhaps this year will be, “victory over croissant rolls.”